Monday, February 9, 2009

To Youth Group, or Not to Youth Group?

If you grew up in church, or joined as a teenager, what was your youth group experience? Was it good, bad, not worth the time you spent there? Sometimes I feel like the last one. While I was in the youth group I thought it was the best thing ever, but as I look back on my time spent in the youth group, all I can think about are the trips I took, games I played, and songs I sang.

Youth pastors have a hard job. Anyone who has dealt with teens knows that, and I appreciate what my home church attempted to accomplish with my youth group. They brought kids in from the outside and taught them just enough to make sure they were saved and not committing the "big" sins, like drugs, sex, or suicide. (I know there is no difference in the severity of sins - I'm just trying to get a point across.) However, looking back I see that getting kids in the fold and keeping them there is not enough.

I recently heard a pastor from TX talking about his youth group, or his so-called "youth group". His church, in fact, did not endorse "youth groups", but family gatherings that focused on the teenagers. You see, this pastor saw many kids going through a normal youth group with mission trips, concerts, game nights, etc, and he found that the parents were completely not involved. He decided to step out on a limb and create a new sort of youth group, in which the teens go with their parents to church to learn God's Word - in the teen's language - and talk over what is going on in their lives and hearts with their families. (Novel idea, huh? Families talking to each other.)

This pastor from TX found that in the home, parents did not feel like they could teach the Word and just relyed on the church to take care of that. When parents step out of the picture, especially with teenagers, a huge problem can develop. So instead of having an outragous party with a cool Christian band, 4 square, and ice cream bar, this pastor invited the parents to come talk to their kids about Christ. The parents learned just as much as the kids, and the families (thus the entire church) became stronger.

And let me be very clear. Mission trips, concerts, games, etc are not bad things. Youth groups are fantastic, but if there is no deep theological teaching and sharing going on, there is a problem. If the parents are not involved and have no idea about how to communicate and relate to the teenager in Christ's love and fellowship, there is a problem. Let me share one final story.

I worked in the French Quarter for some time, and while there I met Johnny Balloons. Johnny is a sinner saved by grace who lives his life as a street evangelist in the Quarter. This guy has had quite the life. He was a homosexual drug and pornography addict and attempted to take his life (I think more than once.) He almost died more than once when he wasn't attempting suicide. In 1984, God opened his heart, and Johnny gave his life over to Christ. He is a good friend of the seminary and works with the mission lab there. As we talked one day, he told me of his intense frustration with the youth that come down to do missions.

He said, "You've got all these kids coming down here without any idea of what they're getting into! These cute little girls are going up to strange men, holding hands with them to pray, and they have no idea that he's just doing that so he can touch them!" This was not his most shocking phrase, but one that definitely hit home with me, being a woman and former "cute little girl" who wanted to do great things in the church. Johnny saw what so many others have seen, America's Christian youth are not being prepared for fighting the spiritual forces which we constantly battle.

So is the answer going to a program like the one in TX? I don't know. To Youth Group, or Not to Youth Group? I think we can totally youth group, as long the youth are being prepared for the kingdom and NOT brought into the church just to be entertained. Youth pastors should not be reduced to baby-sitters.

1 comment:

  1. My experience with youth groups was two-fold. I grew up (Spiritually) in a Holiness church. Our youth group lasted for about one year. I was president, and my BOYFRIEND was VP. When the youth group leader had a falling out with our minister, she left the church and our youth group dwindled down to me and my boyfriend. So in other words, it died. The Baptist church down the road (only one, VERY small town) also had a youth group. It was REALLY BIG and the kids went places every other weekend. I never felt welcome there because the kids just slept through lessons and just wanted to go get punch and cookies and play basketball. They didn't want to learn anything about themselves or about their Savior. I wanted something like the group you talked about in TX! I, too, am not sure which is worse... A youth group that serves as a "day care" during evening church, or a social venue...

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